The Way Girls Bully

I recently clicked my way to an article which contained a video of a news segment discussing a Facebook page that made fun of toddlers and infants. People on this page STOLE pictures from other people's Facebook pages and then proceeded to rip innocent children to shreds, including children with disabilities.

Anyone who knows me intimately is probably already rushing to my home with a pot of warm apple cider to calm me down before I begin my rampage. I am absolutely intolerant of making fun of children. It all stems back to witnessing a woman who was "shopping" (her words) an orphanage website commenting that certain children were "too ugly to adopt" or "too ugly to love". Yes, people say things like that. Mothers say things like that. Despicable, horrible, self-centered, disgusting people say things like that.

The people involved with this group insist that it is their freedom of speech, but I see it as the root of the problem. Ever since I served a stint as a bully myself, I have been fascinated with what causes young girls, and in this case grown women, to attack one another so viciously and maliciously. I frequently recommend Odd Girl Out, Revised and Updated: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls as a great book on this subject.

How and why are we raising our little princesses to be covert emotional bullies? Uh, gosh... could it be that they are learning by example? And here we are as a society, as people, acknowledging this as "just the way things are". Just yesterday my beloved Dog With a Blog touched on the subject when the youngest daughter was taught by her overly-competitive mother to be, well, overly-competitive. Their created motto in a competition among supposed friends was "eat hot death".

Later that night, on an episode of Seinfeld while Elaine and Jerry are discussing wedgies and bullying they had this conversation:

Elaine: Boys are sick.
Jerry: Well what do girls do?
Elaine: Nothing. We just tease someone until they develop an eating disorder.

What did these two scenes have in common? So glad I asked myself... a laughing audience. Because girls rarely come home with broken noses and black eyes, we somehow think that the way they bully is less offensive, but lemme tell ya something. IT HURTS. As both the bully-er, and the bully-ee, I can attest to the real pain that words can cause.

Shame, shame, shame on mothers who teach their little girls to be catty and cruel. If this little baby in my tummy is a girl I'm going to train her up in the ways of Krav Maga. Because broken noses heal with time and eating disorders heal with therapy.









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